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Hello there! I've no idea how you got here, but why not check out some free comics, read a free science-fiction story, play a free text adventure game or perhaps watch a playthrough of the best Discworld game? Maybe you're just trying to check out this Sean Payne guy you've heard about and see his web design portfolio credentials.

Or you could just bugger off, I don't really care if I'm honest.

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How to Improve the Sainsbury’s Christmas 2014 TV Advert

Latest Blog Post:
"How to Improve the Sainsbury’s Christmas 2014 TV Advert"

Posted on Saturday 22nd November, 2014

Disclaimer: before we get started, I’d just like to say that this article is in no way mocking the first world war – a great many people died in that horrible war and taught a lot of people about fighting for what you believe in by sacrificing all they had to give. My modern (fat) arse can’t even begin to comprehend what it must have been like and I, like many, are not too sure about the intentions presented with the Sainsbury’s advert. On the one hand it is good that lots of people are thinking about the first world war as a result of the advert, but on the other hand this is basically a five minute short film that’s been put out to promote a supermarket1. With that thought in mind, on with the article! A few weeks ago John Lewis dazzled us with a bit of cutesy-wutesy...

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The Mercenaries’ Tale – 3.05 The Tamed Dog

Latest Tales of Sin Entry:
"The Mercenaries’ Tale – 3.05 The Tamed Dog"

Posted on Friday 26th September, 2014

The mercs undertook all the little tasks they knew were required when embarking on a job, the little everyday things that might not be possible for a while. They cleaned themselves, prepared their equipment and relaxed. Doug utilised his innate talent for materialising alcohol from out of nowhere to produce a four-pack of beers; he availed himself of two and graciously gave his comrades one each. Around three o’ clock, there was a knock on the door. It was one of the locals, a small man in robes, with a message for Blaise from Annie. They would all be at the monorail sometime that evening. Doug asked if ‘the Scouse’ would be joining them but the little man did not know, he only had the prepared message. The messenger lingered at the doorway, expecting a tip. Doug gave him half a tin of warm beer, which wasn’t completely unappreciated. As...

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Latest Portfolio Article:
"UX: The Invisible Developer"

Posted on Saturday 19th July, 2014

This article was originally posted on the Blogsplosion – it has since been moved here to the portfolio as I really don’t like to mix business and pleasure! Something dawned on me recently and I wanted to put it down on digital paper because although what I’m going to discuss should be obvious, it apparently isn’t. The Non-Existent “Idiot” User UX, a ghastly acronym that actually stands for “User eXperience”, was one of my favourite modules at university. It concerned people’s expectations when they use a device or digital interface, and how systems should talk to their users. One of the biggest UX points is always “feedback” – if there’s a problem with what a user has entered into a system, it needs to explain that there is a problem to the user in the hopes that the problem can be rectified with further human interaction. An example of this...

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TheRussianGestapo's profile on PSNProfiles.com TheRussianGestapo's profile on Playfire
Gamercards provided by PSNProfiles.com and Playfire.com, follow Sean's gaming activity on his PSNProfiles page or on his Playfire profile.
You can also read Sean's many video game related posts on the PAYNEful Blogsplosion.

The Right Brothers

In a little British town, twin brothers Duke and Luke Right try to eke out a living while surviving the colourful and eclectic locals; there's the pair of local mad scientists who keep accidentally unleashing their experiments on the town, the big asylum up on the hill with the revolving door policy, the military camp that specialises in experimental weaponry and a whole menagerie of troublemakers - wannabe gangsters, other (more evil) mad scientists, cinema phantoms and salesmen, to name a few.

Follow the Right Brothers in this typically British comic, a whimsical series of tales in the style of Saturday morning cartoons and British comics like the Beano and Dandy.

Detulux Incorporated - A parody comic about arms dealing

It's not easy being an arms dealer. You've got policemen, secret agents and vigilantes to worry about, and those are just the good guys. Then you've got assassins, rival villains, mercenaries, mad scientists and even the odd environmental protester to consider. And that's not even mentioning the risks of your own hired help...

British criminal Mr. Pain just wants to deal some weapons. Is that so much to ask?

The Two Doctors - A comic about villainous mad scientists

Dr. Ralph Smiffington the Third is a megalomaniacal hunchback with an evil eye and a chip on his shoulder. Dr. Ivanovich Gregori Romani Gyrode is an ageing ex-KGB scientist with a sweet moustache and a passion for disco, along with a penchant for putting small animals into robots. Together, they make the diabolical duo known simply as "The Two Doctors".

Follow the dastardly duo as they cause mischief and havoc in the name of villainy in tournaments such as Steel Nation and the Inter-Dimensional Derby, and then in their own world tour.

Discworld Noir Playthrough

A.k.a "Let's Annotate Discworld Noir" - most people talk over the top of the game when they produce a Let's Play, but since DWN is all dialogue I just annotated the hell out of it instead using YouTube annotations.

Follow the Discworld's first (and possibly last) private investigator as he tries to solve a massive conspiracy that threatens the entire Disc in my Discworld Noir playthrough. Discworld is copyright © Sir Terry Pratchett.

Tales of Sin

Documenting the Great Salmanic Revolution of the future, the Tales of Sin are stories from the future. They crash-landed in my back garden inside a little box, and since then both myself and Sam Dyer have taken it upon ourselves to transcribe them.

These stories are free to read - find out more about the Tales of Sin here or read the most recently archived Tales of Sin here.

Labb Rat - A text-based adventure game

My university final year project, an old-school text-based adventure game.

You're a private investigator, and during the course of your investigation you become trapped. Can you escape the lair of the evil Dr. Labb?

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The Mercenaries' Tale

A work-in-progress science fiction adventure by myself and Sam Dyer, following the adventures of Doug McCracken, Blaise the gunslinger and Gratin the mage as they take on a job for Salmanic Inc, the biggest corporation on their planet. Little do they know that the job may very well prove to be their last...