{"id":2302,"date":"2014-11-22T12:44:09","date_gmt":"2014-11-22T12:44:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/?p=2302"},"modified":"2016-03-16T15:15:19","modified_gmt":"2016-03-16T15:15:19","slug":"how-to-improve-the-sainsburys-christmas-2014-tv-advert","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/2014\/11\/22\/how-to-improve-the-sainsburys-christmas-2014-tv-advert\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Improve the Sainsbury&#8217;s Christmas 2014 TV Advert"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Disclaimer:<\/strong> before we get started, I&#8217;d just like to say that this article is in no way mocking the first world war &#8211; a great many people died in that horrible war and taught a lot of people about fighting for what you believe in by sacrificing all they had to give. My modern (fat) arse can&#8217;t even begin to comprehend what it must have been like and I, <a title=\"It's only a small link as Mr. Davison here manages to be a lot funnier in sharing his points than this entire article ever will be. War shits all over penguins, indeed!\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=nyIofp-v-PA\" target=\"_blank\">like many<\/a>, are not too sure about the intentions presented with the Sainsbury&#8217;s advert. On the one hand it is good that lots of people are thinking about the first world war as a result of the advert, but on the other hand this is basically a five minute short film that&#8217;s been put out to promote a supermarket<sup class='footnote'><a href='https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/2014\/11\/22\/how-to-improve-the-sainsburys-christmas-2014-tv-advert\/#fn-2302-1' id='fnref-2302-1' onclick='return fdfootnote_show(2302)'>1<\/a><\/sup>. With that thought in mind, on with the article!<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>A few weeks ago <a title=\"How to Improve the John Lewis Christmas 2014 TV Advert\" href=\"http:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/2014\/11\/08\/how-to-improve-the-john-lewis-christmas-2014-tv-advert\/\">John Lewis dazzled us with a bit of cutesy-wutesy nonsense that I inexplicably thought could use a healthy dose of gay<\/a>. Sainsbury&#8217;s have now jumped in with an even more Christmassy message, via the most cherished act on the planet that everyone enjoys: war!<\/p>\n<p>In case you haven&#8217;t seen it, check out the video below.<\/p>\n<div class=\"wp-caption\" style=\"width: 650px;\"><iframe loading=\"lazy\" src=\"\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/NWF2JBb1bvM\" width=\"640\" height=\"360\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe>It&#8217;s all very nice until blokes from one side decide to visit their new friends the next day, only to quickly realise that their mate&#8217;s regiment has been switched out with a different, unfamiliar and more trigger-happy regiment. Which was the sad truth in some cases, apparently. Not funny at all, actually.<\/div>\n<p>In short, it&#8217;s a recreation of the historically famous football match between the Germans and our Tommies across no man&#8217;s land during the <a title=\"Wikipedia, ho!\" href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Christmas_truce\" target=\"_blank\">Christmas Truce of 1914<\/a>. The main crux is one of the British lads, Jim, is sent a chocolate bar for Christmas, and while the truce is on he slips it into his new German friend Otto&#8217;s coat pocket because &#8220;sharing is the meaning of Christmas&#8221; (this message brought to you by <span style=\"color: #ff6600;\"><strong>Sainsbury&#8217;s<\/strong><\/span> and our nice big orange logo which we&#8217;ve stuck there in the middle of the screen to let you know we did this).<\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_2303\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"width: 585px\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-2303 size-full\" title=\"It's the thought that counts.\" src=\"http:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas.png\" alt=\"Otto and his bar of chocolate.\" width=\"575\" height=\"360\" data-wp-pid=\"2303\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas.png 575w, https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas-300x188.png 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 575px) 100vw, 575px\" \/><div class=\"wp-caption-text\">&#8220;Aber ich bin allergisch gegen Schokolade &#8230;&#8221; (Feel free to Google translate that one, I did)<\/div><\/div>\n<p>Which is nice, but Sainsbury&#8217;s have really missed a trick here. I reckon they could have done exactly the same short film, albeit with the sort of humorous twist <a title=\"Definitely watch these, if not for the cheesy 80's adverts.\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=lRfDkx7bw1Q\" target=\"_blank\">Jasper Carrot used to give popular TV adverts<\/a><sup class='footnote'><a href='https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/2014\/11\/22\/how-to-improve-the-sainsburys-christmas-2014-tv-advert\/#fn-2302-2' id='fnref-2302-2' onclick='return fdfootnote_show(2302)'>2<\/a><\/sup>. Picture this, lads and ladettes&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>It plays out exactly like before, except when both sides start singing &#8220;Silent Night&#8221; we cut back to the British side and then go one trench over, where we are presented with a familiar (albeit very made up because he&#8217;s now a lot older) face that will bring joy to entire generations&#8230;<\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_2304\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"width: 415px\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-2304\" src=\"http:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas2.png\" alt=\"Suddenly, Captain Edmund Blackadder!\" width=\"405\" height=\"299\" data-wp-pid=\"2304\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas2.png 405w, https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas2-300x221.png 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 405px) 100vw, 405px\" \/><div class=\"wp-caption-text\">&#8220;Oh good, now they&#8217;ve started bloody singing.&#8221;<\/div><\/div>\n<p>&#8230;we find Captain Edmund Blackadder pouring scorn over everything. Typically, Private Baldrick and the Lieutenant George are loving every minute of it (most importantly all three are played by Rowan Atkinson, Tony Robinson and Hugh Laurie, the latter of which doesn&#8217;t have a lot on since <em>House<\/em> finished).<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><strong>Baldrick:<\/strong> Oh come now sir it&#8217;s Christmas Eve!<\/p>\n<p><strong>George:<\/strong> Yes, Blackadder, where&#8217;s your Christmas spirit eh?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Blackadder:<\/strong> Well I don&#8217;t know about you but I can think of better places to spend Christmas. I feel like I&#8217;ve aged decades just being here<sup class='footnote'><a href='https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/2014\/11\/22\/how-to-improve-the-sainsburys-christmas-2014-tv-advert\/#fn-2302-3' id='fnref-2302-3' onclick='return fdfootnote_show(2302)'>3<\/a><\/sup>.<\/p>\n<p>[Canned laughter]<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>The advert continues as normal, until the bit where everyone starts climbing over the trenches to greet their counterparts.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><strong>George:<\/strong> Well this is a turn up for the books! Let&#8217;s go and say hello to old Johnny Foreigner eh?<\/p>\n<p>[Blackadder rolls his eyes.]<\/p>\n<p><strong>Blackadder:<\/strong> Oh go on then. [Muttering to nobody in particular] I guess we can consider this a &#8220;trial run&#8221; of going over the top. [Sarcastically] Just what I&#8217;ve always wanted to do!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Finally, and this is where the pay-off lies, everything plays out as before except, just when we think Jim&#8217;s given Otto his chocolate bar, we cut back to the British trench where Jim quietly snaps off a piece of chocolate and pops it in his mouth. Blackadder storms in&#8230;<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><strong>Blackadder:<\/strong> Alright, which one of you bastards has stolen my chocolate bar? Come on! Own up!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>George and Baldrick give the wink the Jim, who nods appreciatively.<\/p>\n<p>That would be it, but if miracles could be performed there could even be a slight jab at John Lewis and a nice callback to the <em>Blackadder Goes Forth<\/em> episode &#8220;<a title=\"Good episode!\" href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Corporal_Punishment_%28Blackadder%29\" target=\"_blank\">Corporal Punishment<\/a>&#8220;, one of the best Blackadder episodes ever. Randomly, a penguin walks across the trench and Blackadder immediately decides that the best course of action is to shoot it.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-2306 size-full\" title=\"&quot;POW!&quot;\" src=\"http:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas4.png\" alt=\"&quot;POW!&quot;\" width=\"550\" height=\"447\" data-wp-pid=\"2306\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas4.png 550w, https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas4-300x244.png 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 550px) 100vw, 550px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Enter General Melchett, played with exceptional &#8220;meehhh&#8221;-ness by Stephen Fry.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><strong>Melchett:<\/strong> Blackadder, have you seen my pet penguin Monty around?<\/p>\n<p>[Blackadder gives a look to George.]<\/p>\n<p><strong>Blackadder:<\/strong> Well here we go again&#8230;<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<div id=\"attachment_2305\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\" style=\"width: 510px\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-2305 size-full\" title=\"General &quot;Meeehhh&quot; Melchett and Blackadder\" src=\"http:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas3.png\" alt=\"General Melchett and Blackadder\" width=\"500\" height=\"375\" data-wp-pid=\"2305\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas3.png 500w, https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas3-300x225.png 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><div class=\"wp-caption-text\">&#8220;Yes, back at HQ we decided to start using penguins as infantry. <a title=\"It was a memorable Batman film, certainly.\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=Mj_5qjiPFmY\" target=\"_blank\">Proven fact that penguins make for the best soldiers<\/a>. Meeehhh.&#8221;<\/div><\/div>\n<p>My proposed advert brings back a beloved cast of characters and it would probably lessen the disgust at Sainsbury&#8217;s too. You might argue that the Blackadder cast wouldn&#8217;t shill out their characters for such an act of crass commercialism, but that&#8217;s a load of bollocks as <a title=\"It doesn't make me want to buy Snickers, it does make me want to watch Mr. Bean.\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/watch?v=xnd0CAloRHo\" target=\"_blank\">Mr. Bean appeared in a load of Snickers adverts<\/a> recently (much to my surprise!).<\/p>\n<p>What do you think? A bit too crazy? Let me know by leaving a comment below! You can use Facebook, Twitter or Google+.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<a href=\"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/2014\/11\/22\/how-to-improve-the-sainsburys-christmas-2014-tv-advert\/\"><img width=\"125\" height=\"125\" src=\"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas-150x150.png\" class=\"alignright tfe wp-post-image\" alt=\"Otto and his bar of chocolate.\" decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas-150x150.png 150w, https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas-300x300.png 300w, https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-content\/uploads\/SainsburysXmas-200x200.png 200w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 125px) 100vw, 125px\" \/><\/a><p>Disclaimer: before we get started, I&#8217;d just like to say that this article is in no way mocking the first world war &#8211; a great many people died in that horrible war and taught a lot of people about fighting for what you believe in by sacrificing all they had&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2303,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[353,219],"tags":[36,242,255,254,244],"class_list":["post-2302","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-christmas","category-vaguely-topical","tag-advertisements","tag-christmas","tag-sainsburys","tag-televison","tag-tv"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2302","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2302"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2302\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2303"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2302"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2302"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.payneful.co.uk\/blogsplosion\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2302"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}