PAYNEful - the site where humour goes to die, the repository of all things by Sean Patrick Payne

Comic Archive

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Featuring Psi-Baka-Onna

Dr. Ralph Smiffington III, with the help of Dr. Ivanovich Gregori Romani Gyrode, breaks into Professor Loone A. Tick's laboratory and steals schematics for a nefarious machine that can travel through time and space (a bit like the TARDIS from Doctor Who, yes). The question is, how does Ralph plan to use this machine to take over the world?


Chapter 1: A Short Trip to Yesteryear

Taking the Dimensional Universal Relocation Progression System (D.U.R.P.S) for a test run, Ralph takes Gyrode several years into the past out to a facility on the outskirts of Paris to see some familiar faces from Detulux Incorporated. Unfortunately, Mr. Pain is never happy to see Ralph, let alone a version of him from the future...


Chapter 2: The Russian Connection

Featuring DarkeAngel and Psi-Baka-Onna

In the not-too-distant future, a courier is tasked with delivering a top secret package to GRACE, the U.S. division of VIRTUE (a clandestine peacekeeping organisation). The courier, a Russian woman going only by the name of 'Natalia', is a top transporter gifted with the ability of physical metamorphosis. Little does she know that Ralph has designs on the package in her care, and will lead the chase in a pursuit that will follow her around the globe...


Chapter 3: No Business Like the Toy Business

Featuring Jazon19, DarkeAngel and Psi-Baka-Onna

Ralph decides he requires a magical power source, much to Gyrode's chagrin. The two doctors drop in on a previous acquaintance, Dr. Joshua Waite - one of (if not the) foremost authority on occult sciences. Dr. Waite lives in the infamously cursed town of Innsmouth, and has decided to enter the toy industry. However, the Reality Police have an undercover agent prepped to cut the plans of the three doctors short...